The birds, bees and aliens..

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Happy V-alien-tine's Day!

My son and I had quite the day yesterday! Well, let's start at the beginning.. The morning was a flurry of neon green cardstock and coordinating 'alien' green pipecleaners. Together we made 60+ v-alien-tines for his classmates and his teachers. Aren't they just the cutest? Not the traditional take on a valentine, but too cute to pass up. I got the idea from a Family Fun magazine, and since we had yet another snowday, it was a good craft idea. Ok.. shoot forward eight hours.. the family's is sitting watching Wheel of Fortune (one of my MIL's favorites, so we all watch..) and a commercial comes on for Pro-Life. A young woman sits beside her sleeping son, saying how she was so scared to tell grandma and grandpa about being pregnant with him, blah, blah, but she doesn't know what she would do without him now.. Well, Z (nine years old) doesn't get it.

"That's a strange commercial."


"Well, she got pregnant as a teenager and she choose to kept her baby." I said too much right there. It was all over. the birds and bees came at us like a storm of locusts!


"J has to have a baby now." he says. J is his almost seventeen year old sister from his father.


"J's pregnant???" I shout.

"No! But she's held hands with her boyfriend and kissed him, so they have to have a baby now." Alright, he is a VERY intelligent 9 year old, skipped a grade, yada, yada, yada, but he still believes in Santa, and he thinks by kissing someone, that's how the sperm gets in there. (or should I say 'thought'.) The conversation progressed, (with my MIL and hubby laughing and grimacing the entire time) and he now knows a certain item has to be inserted in a certain place for things to happen. The poor kid. I didn't want him to think that by kissing a girl, she would get pregnant! My parents never spoke to me about anything along this subjest matter, and I probably said more than I should, but the birds and bees are natural, and they led to some other 'insightful' bits of info.. for example, I now know he learned the 'c' word on the bus.. well, they told him it ended with a 'd' instead of 't".


When he asked me what it meant, I told him, "Well, I guess, it's a very, very bad slang word for 'vagina'."


He thought that was HYSTERICAL! He said, "They are calling women VAGINAS!!??"


It tickled him pink! Now, you might think I am crazy for talking to him like this, but communication to me is the most important thing you can encourage in your children. I want my son to be able to tell me ANYTHING, without the fear of being punished or ridiculed. He also asked me what being 'gay' was, and about 'periods', having heard both of these terms lately. So I told him. He might be young, but he is with older kids all day, and it's better to know the true, proper meaning and not the sometimes very twisted and misinterpreted definition that other children can come up with.




So, Happy V-alien-tine's Day, Dear Friends! It is the season of love, passion and s-e-x. (And a very endless list of questions coming from little eyes and ears that watch constantly!)

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(the above three images are copyright free clipart.. take them and ravage them!)


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