Everything's kinda grey here right now.

I had such a good morning. Time change, up early to the clock and started a fun day. Went browsing through several antique/junk shops in Meredith looking for more treasure. I did find somethings, but they have lost their spark. I had a phone call from my brother this afternoon. I have mentioned him before, he choose to re-enlist in the Army after 20+ years out. 2 little kids, etc. He needs to be a hero. A hero. I wish I could make him see he's already a hero. To me, his kids, his family. Anyway.. he was heading to Afghanistan in December. Not anymore. He's heading to the Middle East today. Tonight. While I type. He's gone. I wanted to tell him so many things. That I love him, that I hope he stays safe. To come home. He is in the middle of divorce, and as if that's not enough of a battle, now he's going to war. My shop, my blog, everything that seemed so important to me this morning just doesn't mean much right now. My family. I want to gather them up and keep them close. I want to clean my home, make dinner, take stock of everything that's TRULY important and stop focusing on ridiculous, frivolous, crap. I am not religious person. But tonight, while I drove to pick up my son, I prayed. I prayed so hard tears ran down my face. My two year old said from the backseat 'It's all better, momma.' I said 'Yes, it's all better.' But it won't be. Not right now.