My Wee Weensy Life...

I apologize for being gone so long. It is so hard to get out my little box sometimes. It is a nice box though, filled with distractions. I have had tangible friends over for visits. It is so nice to spend time with those I haven't seen in years, but have known most of my life. To be able to give hugs.. I can not hug 'you'.. unfortunately... I like hugs.

My wee weensy life is occasionally pestilent and filled with the trails of family so I come here to hide...

.. and to rest. It is a nice place, caught within four walls and filled with delicate happiness.

I'll be back.. I'm just not sure when my little box will let me out.

xoxo~

Abbie

(The 'scene' is a small cardboard box that I decorated for my daughters. The chest of drawers is an antique Aunt Lydia thread spool. The bed is made of cardboard and antique wallpaper, the carpet - an antique lace doily and the tiny mushroom I made from clay. )

Page 9

Yesterday, one year ago, my father in law passed away. It is hard to believe that already a year has fluttered by, but sometimes it seems as if it was just yesterday. For one year now I have shared my home with another woman. Strange, but lovely all the same. She fills the children with smiles, and I know they do the same for her. I'm finding it more true each year, that the older you get the faster the years go, and I'm only 33! When I'm seventy will they seem to flash in a blink?

The sunflowers are blooming and the leaves are starting to change already. Our nights are getting quite brisk, but we have yet to get a frost severe enough to kill the mosquitoes. I got bit several times taking photos of the jumbo blooms in our backyard. Some are about 10 feet tall right now!

Well, sending my daughter off to preschool has back fired, sort of. She has had a lurking cold since she started, and the all day thing yesterday fired it right up. Today she sits very quiet, watching TV, snorting, sneezing, and very drippy eyed. Anytime a 3 year old sits quiet for hours on end, you know they don't feel well.

Off to spoon feed chicken rice soup into her.. thank you for the questions and thoughts about my hubby. He has another Dr's appt today so hopefully he'll get the 'all clear'.

xoxo~

Abbie

Taggin' Along..

A few weekends ago, my brother needed my help with a wedding cake setup. For those of you who are unfamiliar, he is a pastry chef and owns a chocolate/cake business. (handmade chocolates, and cakes.. separate. Not 'chocolate-cake'. ) Anywhooo.. it was a lot of fun to see him work as he is a phenomenal designer! Here is the assembly in progress, as it has to be assembled on site in a about an hour. Butter cream frosting and a delicate white cake. Ohhh... his cakes are more beautiful to eat than to look at (if that is at all possible).

All the layers get stacked on site.

The rose garlands, all handmade. Waiting to go up.

Filling in the layers and hiding the stand base.

Piping, piping and more piping.

Up. Up. Up. The couple spent almost their entire wedding budget on the cake. It was front and center at their reception, a school gym. Almost all of my brothers cakes are done at high end resorts, so this was quite different. No air conditioning. (not a good combo with butter cream frosting on a 85 degree day.)

I just love the little dot clusters. So cute!

The finished cake! Dead center of the gym! :) Here are some more cakes he has made..

This is a scan of a slide from my childhood. The wee one on the right is me, to give you an idea of size, my mom (middle) is less that 5 feet tall. I think this image was from 1977-8. My father was in the Air Force for 30+ years and we traveled constantly. At this time we were living in Naples, Italy. My eldest brother is in the stripes. I have been back to Paris several times, but haven't been as an adult. Someday perhaps..

As promised.. for Rachel.

The holly hocks have been growing in front of the house for a hundred years. Or so my grandmother says..
You can see a peek of the raised vegetable beds. All sorts of lettuces!
Throughout the property you can find parts and pieces stacked and displayed. I have more photos of the twisted vine you can just see a bit of in the upper right corner.
Old chicken coops stacked under the barn.
The view down the driveway, lined with maple trees.

Summer...

My nephew 7.15.08

I have been enjoying the simplier things and quiet moments. OK, I am lying. My husband would have snorted loudly when he read that. Actually, as much as I would love to settle down and just breathe, my family stresses me out. To the point of an ocular migraine yesterday morning. Mind you, I do love my family, but for some reason, I get quite flustered when everyone is around. Take dinner the other evening. I had my brothers over with their families and my mom. There were only 13 of us, not that many considering there are usually 6 at our table every night. It ended with my 9 year old son projectile vomiting all over my 'clean for the moment' kitchen. Uuuhh??? Why? It was a difficult evening anyway, but why? Why must it end so? Are anyone else's 'perfect' family moments and summer get together's foolishly ridiculous too?? Anyone? Or are all the photos I see on your blogs the 'true' story? Romantic, fabulous, and sans vomit?

Oh well. Our pack is going to my aunt's house later, I'll try to sneak some pictures for you. Her gardens are to die for and the house, oh the house. The barn, the buildings, just about the most perfect 200+ year old New England farm you have ever seen.

Hope you are relaxing and breathing.

Local goodies that my daughters eat by the fistful.

My Maternal Grandparents...

Clara Hale

Elmer

Second sailor from the left. Isn't he just dashing?

He passed away at age 40 from a massive heart attack, leaving my grandmother with 4 children to raise on her own. She never remarried. Clara would write to him in her journals, and I know the day she passed away (39 years later) was probably the happiest of her life, as she could finally see him again.

The last few years she suffered from Alzheimer's. It was a truly sad love story.

Many years later, my son was born the day my grandfather died.

Brake for Moose..

I'll be taking a brake from blogging for awhile. My father in law's burial is just around the corner and we have family coming from far and wide, (can't wait to see you guys!!) Z has started baseball but also still has Scouts. T has completely regressed on her potty training and baby A is a very whinny little girl lately! (I think she is teething..) The house needs a good cleaning and organizing (as usual) and I have a swap project to work on. (Hi Rhonda! I'm workin' on it!) Just life is happening and when the weather allows, we are outside soaking up the sun. (Soon we'll be soaking up the rain, as it's on it's way!)

I hope everyone is fabulous out there in the great wide world, I read your comments and love them all! I'll try to also catch up on my blog readin' as that has gone by the wayside and I really need to visit you all.

The pic above is a peek at the page I am working on for Rhonda's Book Swap!

Enjoy spring!

xoxo~

Abbie

Don't Count Your Eggs..

Well, we made it. The children were amazing in the car, but my little one wouldn't let me put her down the entire time we were gone. So, needless to say, it was not a 'vacation' by the essence of the word, but it was a good time and the kids enjoyed seeing their grandpa.

Before I left with the kids, as a family we walked our field and cleaned out the bird boxes. So many treasures and also pain. We found a wasps nest, an unhatched sparrows egg. A dead sparrow. New, probably arrived alittle too early this spring and froze. In the blue bird's box we found two tiny pale blue eggs, one intact unhatched, and the other broken, but not a successful fertilization. Now I know where the phrase 'Don't count your chickens before they hatch.' comes from.

Yesterday morning, before the house was up, I received a phone call that one of my classmates from high school had passed away suddenly. The phone rang for quite awhile and there was a lot of hashing through old memories and many ghosts came flying from the closets. My mother came over and I went to a funeral for a 33 year old woman. Probably the saddest funeral I have been too, as it didn't make much sense and there was no relief in sight for the family. I left quickly, not wanted to go back to that place of adolescence. It was not an overly happy time in my life and I'm trying very hard to make the shift of mind to the 'now' and to the 'tomorrow'.

I have lost some very good friends and have found others. I have also lost some not so good friends and found people to replace those as well. When I left the funeral, it was OK. It is hard to explain, but I was OK. I am happy with my life and where it is at. I am at peace with my family, those close to me and there are no regrets. I saw a lot of regrets yesterday. That was probably the hardest part for most, they weren't as sad about the passing of a friend, but were angry at themselves for all the 'should have's' and 'if only's'. To this point in my life, I can honestly say that the decisions I have made have been the right ones and I am at peace. Do you have any regrets? Any unspoken words of love, pain or angst? Any unreturned phone calls? Speak them now, for you never know which eggs aren't going to hatch in the morning..

So, this post isn't about my vacation, although my few days away helped my hubby and I see each other through new eyes. It was about death and a rebirth. The rebirth of my confidence. My understanding and comprehension that, in the words of Martha, my life is a 'good thing'.

Road Trip!

Bright and early tomorrow morn I am packin' up the three kiddos and my grandmother. Our destination is my father's in Ottawa, about 7 hours away if the Travel Gods smile upon us gently.

When I was a child we traveled constantly. The top photo is of my eldest brother, my mom and myself (the wee one..) in Paris.. circa 1978-ish... at that time we lived in Naples, Italy and my parents owned the finest of travel accommodations. A green VW bus, custom outfitted with a pop-up sleeper. We used it well and whenever the chance happened we were off and cruisin' Europe.
Don't ya just love the pink sleepy PJ's with the feet? I can remember those so well! The toes were way too long and the white felted plastic tips flopped as I walked. Anyway, I think every person in my family has very fond memories of our adventures. I don't remember most, as I was so young, but I have the pictures to prove it!

So, anyway, off I go, to make a few memories for my children and for myself. Wish me luck! Honest, wish me luck, cause I'm really not so sure about the 7 hours thing with a 10 month old, a two and half yr old, a nine yr old and my grandmother of all people! I will return sometime on Tuesday, hopefully with all my hair.

Have a fabulous weekend dear friends!!
xoxo~
Abbie

A room with a view..

I have enjoying peeking at Rosies's Porch coming together for spring.. it just looks so fabulous and inviting! We have a sun room/porch off of our living room. Although it has been brisk and chilly, the sun beats in during the afternoon and warms it right up. I love sitting out there and pretending I am on retreat.. the full windows (which soon will be swapped for screens) just let you view the entire back woods behind our home, and I escape out there in the evenings. Soon we will be able to eat our dinners out there and enjoy the birds, green grass (my husband keeps a mean lawn!) and the breeze. so, welcome to my haven, no fluffy couches (Would love when $ allows) but lots of good feelings.. unless dead animals hung on the walls offends.




The image above gives a peek at a coyote that my father in law got a few years back. They are wonderful majestic creatures, but in these parts they wreak havoc on the deer populations, especially during hard winters like the one we just had. The deer can't run well in deep snow and the coy-dog packs just run them dead. We also have a large moose rack from my hubby, and one of two boar heads that will hang in there. The large metal trout, hubby and I purchased when we were married. In the first photo, you can just see the paddle of an enormous oar, also from my in laws. So for all you animal lovers, I apologize, but we are animal lovers too.. just served up with gravy, roasted or braised in white wine.

And yes, we still have snow.

Thinking of him...

Well, my stacks are getting larger.. I am not crocheting quite as voraciously as I was, but the work is progressing slowly on my brother's blanket. For those of you who are new to my blog, my brother is currently serving in Afghanistan.

Last night I kept my eyes open long enough to watch the Diane Sawyer interview with Randy Pausch about his Last Lecture at Carnegie Mellon. Oh, it was wonderful. Truly sad, but uplifting and enlightening all at the same time. Now, I have a new item for my wish list, his book. If you are unfamiliar with him, please check out the site! It is worth every minute! You can also watch his last lecture here.

Have a happy day!

xoxo~

Abbie

gggrrrr... blogger is still acting up.. 2/3 of my sidebar is gone.. can you see it? and comments still aren't working right..

Still stuck in snow.. but the sun is shining!

I am keeping house at a new blog.. Button Floozies! The floozies are starting to come out of closet, so beware, you never know when you might run into one! ;) So, that is were my energy is right now.. tomorrow I will be posting about one the most amazing paper crafts I have seen! (and I LOVE paper!) Alright, I'm not saying anymore.. you'll have to come back and see.

The above image is of a collage pack I sold awhile ago. The images are actually high res scans of old family pictures. The charming sailor second from the left is my grandfather. The young lady with the spectacles is a great aunt, I think.. If you peek at the bottom of the pic, there is an 1897 advertisement for 'Exhausted Vitality'! Ha!! Who knew! Viagra could sold like hot cakes 100 years ago!

I hope everyone is having a fabulous Spring.. keep the pictures coming please, we are still buried in snow here! Every bit of spring inspiration on your blogs is very appreciated!

Desperately Seeking Balance

A few people have posted lately about life, balance, and finding their creative energy. Mary and Kathy have been searching and, from my understanding, have finally found a peace with themselves and the direction their life/craft/art is taking. I am currently a stay at home who has put most personal endeavors (school, art, career) on the back burner to raise my children and take care of my family and home. This shift is a very hard struggle for me. I am trying to find creative outlets in my kitchen, but I truly feel as if I am in a form of hibernation or cryostasis.

Waiting.

Waiting for what?

I was in a local quilt shop the other day and I was having a pleasant adult conversation with the owner. (Adult conversations don't come by that often so when they do I jump on the opportunity to use some three syllable words) I mentioned that it would fabulous (and my dream) to open a scrapbooking/craft shop in the same plaza. (it is a new plaza, with some empty store fronts) She said that a local woman was considering opening a yarn shop and that it could be a great 'one stop shop' area for crafters and artisans. In return, I replied that I needed to wait a few years yet, until my children were at least school age before I could start a retail business venture. Then she gave me some advise.. the only words of wisdom she had were 'Don't Wait.' Starting her business at 49, she said that the days were long and the work was hard and she could really use youth on her side.

How long is too long? What am I giving up? Or am I not 'giving up', but receiving instead? Do I need to be at home, and focus solely on the 'mother/wife/caregiver me', for me to appreciate the 'business, artist, creative me' later in life? Is experience, appreciation, and peace something that comes in time, or does it come when you reach out and grab for it? I suppose there is no right or wrong answer here. It would be nice to look back when I am 50 or 60 and not have regrets. Not wonder about all the 'what ifs'. Now is the time in my life that I need to make the choices that will steer my future, to avoid the malaise of 'the things never done', or the 'it would have been nice to ____'s.

Ok. I am done. I am confused. So here I sit, typing on my PC, a choice, instead of researching a business venture, or working on an art piece. Perhaps is is time to rethink my direction right now...

Mr. Blue Bird on my Pitcher...

This pretty little pitcher was given to me this weekend.. isn't it lovely? It sits on top of my kitchen cabinets.. I wonder what he sees in there? A little worm perhaps? The plate is a summer plate. Something that is not coming quite fast enough!

Also this large, vintage (or antique) tomato cookie jar! Isn't it so much fun?! Just perfect for my red and white kitchen!

And this lovely birdie I purchased from Kathy. She has one little bird left in her Etsy Shop. Yes, the snow is still here.. you can see a glimpse of it out the kitchen window. We joked yesterday that the only way we could have an outside Easter Egg Hunt was if the eggs were left white and we just threw them into the snowbanks.

I hope everyone of you had a lovely Easter and enjoyed the time with your families!

I roasted boneless leg of lamb with garlic and rosemary. It smelled so fabulous cooking in the oven.. also we had a spiral cut ham, asparagus, homemade bread, carrots, salad, and scalloped potatoes. To finish off, we enjoyed a lemon meringue pie and coconut cream pie. I wanted to take some pictures but I figured my family would think I had lost my rocker!!

Draw on Walls...

This is a previous post from 2 years ago.. as most of you weren't with me then, I thought I'd share again..

The sap is just starting to flow in New Hampshire. My grandfather, although passed away, still lives in his sap house. I can see him every time I drive by.. loading wood in the furnace in his LL Bean slippers..




A few years ago Z and I stopped by to visit with my uncle who was boiling. I was looking around with my camera and spotted some sketches on the wall.




Faces peering back at me. Almost like ghosts of those who worked here before. I asked my uncle about them and he told me a really neat story that I wanted to share.


Every time he lights the fire under the boilers he uses a long thin stick. After blowing it out, the end is charcoal. Not wanted to waste it, and having a need to draw everyday, he sketches on the wall until the charcoal is gone.


My uncle is an eccentric, fascinating man. An honest, hardworking person who teaches me every time I see him.


Don't waste the charcoal. Draw everyday. Even if it is on the walls.